On moving out

So we moved out.

We moved in with Bradley.

Our new house still has boxes lying around.

And still tons of work to do before it looks like a home.

But I wake up in our room and because we have so much space I have a white bed set and white curtains because I can make rules like no eating in mommies room because well we have a whole house to eat in.

Its bliss.

You see at my parents place the only real space was my room which also happened to have the downstairs tv in so it was kind of like a train station for every one. I felt very suffocated.

I don't any more. I can breathe again.

I am however a tad bit homesick. A tad bit sad to be building a new life without my parents in it every step. I have moved out before, I lived in Cape Town for 2 years so it's not the shelter of home I miss it's my family.

The last few years have been super rough and having a child at home is different in the sense that they not only my immediate family but Aidens as well. They the ones who came with me to scans and rushed me too the hospital when I went into labour. They were there when I had nervous breakdowns from sleep deprivation and the ones who shared all his milestones with me.

They are my life as much as Aiden is and I do miss them and I don't want to loose that or get to busy to keep it.

So even though I have moved out, a part of me and my heart will always be there and it will always be mine and Aidens home.

If I can even be half as great a parent as mine have been I know I will have done a brilliant job.

So to my mom and dad, I love you with everything I have and I am the woman I am today because of your continuous love, support and encouragement.

I have a pocket full of change

My entire life is up in shambles at the moment. In both good ways, bad ways and sad ways. Everything is changing, my life is being redesigned and hopefully in a few months it will be flowing again with routine and structure. I like plans and schedules, not a huge fan of living in the moment, I need to plan the moments and always have full control or I go a bit dilly.

First big change my darling sister left for the big USA. Now if you have read this blog for any amount of time you'll now that she is a huge part of my life and my heart. It broke my heart to say goodbye and I often cry when i think of her but as sad as it is I am happy for her and so proud that she's brave enough to follow her dreams. She's off au pairing for a family with 10 children, crazy right.

I'm taking the leap and moving out of my parents home. I have lived on my own before but not since falling pregnant. Im scared to say the least but also super excited. On top of just moving out, im moving out with my boyfriend, we have discussed our future and what it holds and it's right for us regardless if peoples judgements.

Aiden is moving school's.  This decision made me toss and turn at night for weeks. I'm worried about too much change all in one go but I'm not happy with his current school so praying I made the right decusion and he takes to everything well.

It's all a lot right now but it's all finally coming together.

I"m not a great happy writer

I haven't done a post in over a month, I open my blog every day and every day I think today I'll write something. Problem is I'm not very good at writing when I'm happy, when things are going well. Get me on a bad day and my journal is full of my deepest thoughts, I can put out sarcastic and heart wrenching posts but make me write about perfect days filled with smiles and laughs and I become rigid in my writing and it almost comes out as a step by step guide on a good day.

So here is a "step to step"post on what has been happening.

My toddler is quite literally insane or maybe he is just making me insane. I think terrible two's are starting to kick in full force and he's keeping us all on our toes all the time! He still doesn't sleep through the night and basically instead of fighting it I have just come to accept it and just continue to pray that one day before I die I'll get a few good nights sleep in and if not I guess I'll sleep a good few hundred years of my eternity in heaven.

We moving out! This I could write about, it's a bundle of mixed emotions, I'm scared, I'm nervous, I'm excited and I'm confused. I need a good few days to actually think about it before I sit and write about what it all means to me but while I put that in the back burner of my brain, I am focusing on decorating my new home in my head.

My company is thriving, more than I expected it would in the almost year it has been officially running. I love my job, I love having my mother has my partner, I love the fact that regardless of all my failures and mistakes in life I can firmly stand proud that at the age of 25 I own a successful business that is growing every day.

I'm starting another little side project that I will share soon. It's pure passion and I'm super excited to get it going.

I'm in love. I have found 'the one' and I have my very own little happy family.

So in between packing, working, running around after a little terror I am going to try focus a bit more time to my little blog here, I miss it.

With Fathers Day looming

It's that time of the year again only this year my heart is in a whole different place. I've come to realise although Aiden's bio dad is nothing to brag about we have some pretty awesome men in our lives. My dad, who is probably the best grandpa I've ever seen. My crazy ass brother who will be the cool uncle I won't let my kid go out with after a certain age and then the man in my life, our life, who treats my boy as his own.

I have been trying to find ways to show my gratitude to Bradley on Fathers Day but without the blatantly "daddy" things as I'm not quite sure where and when that will be acceptable. We learning here daily, baby steps. Along my research I found these cards, they not particularly what I was looking for but they funny.

Happy Fathers day to all the great men who raise their children, all the miracle men who help raise other mens children and to all the single mommy's doing it alone, it's your day too!

In our backyard (almost) - Rietvlei Farm

Lately we've gotten into quite a rut, we became hermits for a while and weren't getting out the house at all. Thus making us all a tad insane and making the toddler extremely uncontrollable. It's hard to find things to do and places to go that are kid friendly and affordable. And when I say kid friendly I mean an environment where the kids can play freely and I can watch them from a distance.

Now I have lived in Alberton my whole life and I always tend to venture out when we plan something to do because well it's the South, what exactly is there to do here. Low and behold, there is a gem of a place literally down the road from me and if you venture past the front section there is a little kiddies heaven. (No I never knew this place existed) I have always taken my car to get washed there and then stop at the very open restaurant, which is like sitting in your garden with a waiter.

A little while ago we went a little further and found what Rietvlei Farm is really all about. For R25 for adults and R12 for kids you step into a huge farm with a Petting Zoo, picnic facilities, braai facilities, lapa's to rent for birthday parties, train rides, pony rides, tractor rides, there's even a Spa! The list goes on and on.

It's our new favourite spot.

And my new mission to find things to do closer to home.

When life is good

Life changes all the time and it's finally changed in a good way, a great way. With picnics, and bird parks and playing soccer outside after school. With work flying in and a future being built. Less tears and more smiles. Life is good. It's the little things that make it so wonderful.

Photoshoot by Butterfly Fantasies

I am a happy snapper, I always take tons and tons of photo's. I am the friend people ask to snap away at their kids birthday parties and I even take photo's at all my own events, being the one behind the camera means I never get nice photo's of myself and especially with my beautiful boy. So much so people have commented how they don't think I raise Aiden as much as my sister does (oh the anger with that one). That's why when Tanya Holmes from Butterfly Fantasies offered Aiden and I a shoot I jumped at the opportunity. I love how they all so natural and not so posy and she even made me a slide show with all the best shots to my choice of song "Your Song- Elton John" that I dedicated to Aiden when he was born. Here are a few of my favourites.

 

Special moments Aiden